seniorits at it's finest

Being 10 years old was possibly one of the greatest things that has happened in my life thus far. 

Think about it, not a baby or small child, but not a teenager either. I could play outside without my mother making a fuss. I could peddle my purple bike down to the convince store to get candy, and I could eat as much ice cream as I damn well pleased. I read the harry potter series religiously, and my father's shoulders were the highest place in the world. If I wanted to wear crocs and gaucho pants, nobody would judge me, because I was adorable. 

Eight years have passed and I am no longer adorable. 

I spend the majority of my life in a crowded building with other adolescents, some resembling the faces and attitudes of adults, and others with the biceps and maturity of 13-year-olds. To think that there are nearly 2,500 other people I see in that building every day, yet I can count out the amount of people I actually associate myself with on both hands. 

I cover the face that God has graced me with in mass amounts of makeup to meet an appearance exceptional to acne covered, horny 17-year-old boys. Why I do it, God may only know. I've been called a "slut" or "whore" more times than I can count, yet I'm still a virgin. My worth is calculated into a grade point average by eight adults that do not know me personally, and probably do not like me. My gpa is a pointless number that defies my intelligence and I in no way shape or form, yet to college board of admissions, it determines my future. 

I am not high school. I am not the opinions of people that know my name and face and only my name and face. I am the songs I listen to driving in my car with the windows rolled down on a warm evening. I am the tears that I've shed into my pillow numerous times when I've felt completely alone. I am every good and bad decision I've ever made. I am the light in my eyes when I hear your name. I am every chai tea latte and dirty dr. pepper I've consumed in the past six months. I am the stupid jokes I make that I still laugh at when I'm alone with my thoughts. 

I've laughed and cried and sang and danced and read and slept and hoped and dreamed myself into the person I am today. And so are you. So the next time someone tries to tell you that you are just a high school student, or that you can't accomplish anything because of your gpa, or judges you for your appearance instead of you character, remember these words. You are so much more. 

May 28th, please come faster.